Just Dad & Me
I’ve been mustering about on my computer trying to design the perfect postcard to send home to my dad (who’s on the other side of the country) for his birthday this year. Lately, I’m quite adverse to the typical birthday cards you find in stores, as the sentiments never truly ring home.
Since I finally bought a colour printer, I’ve been designing postcards to send to those I love for any occasion that deems worthy… But for the past week I’ve just been feeling really overwhelmed and even less creative. And then the thought struck me – why don’t I just write a post on my dad? I can fit many more words on a screen than a small postcard and he’s definitely worth more than a novel, so here goes… And as this post should somehow relate back to marriage, I’d love to reflect on the enormous impact that father’s have in their daughter’s lives.
When a man has done his best, has given his all, and in the process supplied the needs of his family and his society, that man has made a habit of succeeding.
Mack R. Douglas
As most adults already know, the relationship between father and daughter progressively sets the stage for the daughter’s future romantic involvements. As a young woman, her general attitude towards men is quietly and prominently shaped by her father; while within marriage, a woman’s relationship with her husband can easily be rooted back to her father’s direct or even indirect influence.
When a father praises his daughter’s beauty and teaches her self-respect, she is more likely to seek out the same qualities in her prospective life partner. If he chooses to integrate discipline and love to show strength, she will be more open to a balanced marriage that perpetuates mutual respect.
A foundational and committed father demonstrates both the realities and successes that marriage can bring; giving the daughter encouragement and strength to fight for her marriage on a daily basis. While a mother prepares her daughter to function within a family (such as conflict management), the father is equipped to prepare her to function in the environment outside of the home – guiding her intellectual and social development.
Certain is it that there is no kind of affection so purely angelic as of a father to a daughter. In love to our wives there is desire; to our sons, ambition; but to our daughters there is something which there are no words to express.
Joseph Addison
Growing up, I was obsessed with my father – chasing after his interests and hobbies to make them my own. He was the man of my life until I met my future husband and he will always be my first love. I remember how my father radiated respect, strength, and commitment; teaching me to appreciate small successes and hard work, to hold myself together through life’s tough challenges, and to never give up.
While he likes to joke that I was born with all of his “smarts”, I know better that through the years he himself seeded my self-confidence, firm resolution and never-ending thirst for knowledge to better myself every single day.
My favourite thing about him is his silent strength. He has always been there for me, and I know I could ask him for anything; even though I try my best not to. I guess it’s because my only request is that he stick around for a little while longer. The only thing I need from him is his very presence, even from afar.
He has been pivotal in my outlook on life and although there are no words to describe the appreciation I hold in my heart, I can only pray to reflect his success through my own marriage and family.
I would like to thank you Dad for shaping me into the woman and wife that I am today.
And I look forward to my unborn children knowing you as their grandfather and “horsey” (if you still can by then of course ;). I hope to one day design you a house with a big foundation, strong walls, and a stable roof that reflects the genuine care and love that you have instilled in my life. I will always take care of you for taking such good care of me.
To my wonderful father on his birthday — I love you with all my heart.
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again.
Enid Bagnold
Marriage Against All Odds 